Stupid internet

I hate it when whatever i type for so long is all gone because of the stupid internet connection.
Now that im tired of writing and feeling really sien...
Im not gonna rewrite the whole thing.
Just know that im feeling shit now.

When adaptation jump straight to irreversible injury...

According to what i read in patho book, cell undergo adaptation and then reversible injury and then finally, irreversible injury. So when we apply this into our daily life, this is what happens :

Emo-ness

I decided at critical time like now,my one and only wish for this coming exam is just to pass.
As in, pass both my foundation and dental science of course.
Be it B or C (A is far from reach...Im trying to not think about it.)...
Just let me pass and i'll be really grateful.

I decided, once and for all, that if im lucky enough to pass my exam, i will study very very very very very hard starting from next semester onwards.
Reason being, with only 3days to EOS and yet you find yourself stuck in the middle of nowhere and there's nothing more you can do about it, this kind of feeling...is unbearable.

IM officially getting EMO now.

Lovin Me

I decided i will not love anyone except me,myself and I.

I said ME,MYSELF AND I.

To avoid trouble, confusion and heartache.

FFF SSS THHHHH Wuuuuuuuuuuu

Is trouble-free life really unachievable?

Sometimes i wonder why god creates human only to make them face so much problem in their lives.Trying to make us mature and more sensible i guess.But sometimes its just so unbearable it makes me wanna cry out loud and say "i've had enough!!!"

Tired.Disorganized.Clueless.Emotionless.Helpless.Heartache.

At the end of the day,i realised,it just means nothing...

Just some random thoughts

Believe me when i say,i find myself becoming weirder and weirder towards the exam.

Think weirdly, act weirdly, behave weirdly. How come?

Might be some kind of hormone fluctuations or whatsoever...

Haiya basically these are all rubbish.

Never mind i should just summarize my end of eos to-do list :

(1) Saloon-ing to get my hair done

(2) Massage!!Whole body massage...Time to pamper myself :)

(3) Shopping...For clothes and shoes and many many many many more

(4) Watch movies!I dont mean just 1 but many

(5) Club-bin lol. This need to be done to restore my "normalcy"

(6) SLEEP...SLEEP...AND MORE SLEEP...(I want my skin to look good again...badly)

(7) Oh yea and lastly in mind now is...Ultimate plan in dieting...sigh...(I'll make sure i carry this out accordingly.Im serious.)

For all the time i've been day-dreaming about all the stupidest thing to be done after exam, its time for me face the reality that its time for me to study now.

Once again, believe me when i say, NO PAIN NO GAIN!

Happy Birthday!

Happy 20th birthday to myself!
Apparently my only wish for this year is just to pass EOS and move on to sem3...
How sad.
Ooops and of cos,wish me and my family happy and healthy and free from worries!!!
I love you, you love me... :)

Happy? Maybe not.

5 days to my birthday!
Happy but know in the end just gonna end up studying at home :(
There goes my precious 20th birthday...sigh...

:(

I need to cry...

Haizzz

Now maybe it is OBVIOUS.

My dear model

Its basically a head model i borrowed from MMS...
i actually bring it back home and he's facing me right now lol.
the whole purpose is just for me to study head and neck anatomy
but too bad i rather blog than to entertain him...

Guess i should start entertaining him or he'll leave me by 7 pm later :(

Its a weird day

Summative is over,worst still i actually know my result already,plus dental OPSE result as well. Both doesnt look good to me... sad sad sad~~~ Dental OSPE was an utter disappointment, and foundation2 summative is basically... satisfactory but then again, i wish i had done better. I just wanna be one of those who can proudly say, "Oh emm i got about 3-4 wrong...blablabla" instead of "Hmm not bad at least i pass"...Eventhough i got an A-, if not mistaken.

Well according to thomas life is hard, and come to think about it, yeah its indeed hard.for me.right now.

Sudden loneliness is surrounding me...now...

Late night horror

I hope i'll be able to catch some good sleep after this...though its a bit quite impossible,summative is in 13 hours time.Its really really bothering me but im just so tired i need to sleep.a proper proper sleep.

I love you.You love me.

Haha

What the...
im suppose to say "Hmm life is just so beautiful..."
Not "Hmm is just so beautiful..."
Haizz

Sudden happiness??!

23 hours to summative, 25 hours to freedom.
How bad can it be?
Stop complaning!
Hmm is just so beautiful...Love it!! LOL.

Emmy is going crazy

I have no idea what am i doing here and why am i writing on my blog now.
This is definitely not the right time to do so but somehow it just happen.??
And yeah, im going crazy thats right.
1 day to summative and i still have tonnes to read.
And im allowing time to pass by every second every minute every hour.
I just want the whole world to know i'll becoming insane in perhaps 10 minutes time.
Till then...

Wordless

I think im lost.

Its 5.05pm.
Please tell me i can finish fungi and virus and 2 more patho notes by 12.00am.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

Towards death-ness

Now i really just wanna say something bad.
FUCKKKKKKKKKKK!!!

countdown to summative

Whenever i look at the calender...i cant help but to feel scared, tense, and disturbed.
But in comparison with some of my fellow classmates...i think im feeling ok, and not too stress.
Just look at me, i still got time to blog while im suppose to be facing my notes!
And now that im overwhelmed some pretty horror thoughts, i believe its time for me to go...STUDY,i mean.

Just some shit

With so much shit i wrote, u could've guess im unhappy today.

Post-studymarathon feedback

Its 10.44pm and im officially pulling myself out of this study marathon.
Good to know that at least i accomplished something today...but still, it could've been better i guess.

Completed the scariest ever notes...pharmacokinetics...and hypersensitivity...and chronic inflammation...and half of acute inflammation...and im KO right now.Even my eyes are a bit blur looking at the screen, hope i'll be fine.

Oh yeah, today i learnt something. That, human being is indeed complicated, and unpredictable, and very very hard to please.

9.20am - Beginning of study marathon

Yes! Its 9.15 am now and im gonna begin my study marathon in 5 minutes time.
I hope today will be a great day with great achievement as this is the only day where i've got no lecture no lab no pbl no nothing.

So...a whole day ahead of me and im so not going to waste yet another day.
No more nonsense, no more playing sleeping onlining.
3,2,1 Go! :)

Explosion

At this point of my life, it seems like im gonna explode soon. very very soon.
People are irritating me all the time. endlessly. this and that. blablabla. i cant take this anymore!!!

I've got lots and lots of problem and stress at the moment and i've been trying really hard to tolerate and take it easy but... things just not getting any better. Such a shame im in this kind of situation right now.

Im on the verge of crying. Maybe i should cry. Yes i think i should...

Just like any other day...

Stress is killing me!
But somehow it seems like i've come to adapt to this kind of lifestyle and im happy with the lecture today...
Im surprised to know that i actually enjoy lectures now,unlike before,but unfortunately this is already the second last week of semester2,sighhh!

Just some additional stuff to add on (If Abir were to read this...) :
Dearest Abir,
Hows UK?Hows Swansea?Hows hari raya?
Miss the raya last year,esp the cookies from your aunt!they're just sooooo unbelievably tasty i cant even forget the taste till now :)
Btw the most important thing is, can you please give me your msn add?
there're just so much to catch up with and i doubt facebook will be the perfect place to send messages and stuff! Need to talk to u! Miss u dearly, and jessica too!
Hope ur doing well over there,and...whats ur blog again?

Satisfaction

Good to know i completed something meaningful today!
Let's see...i finished intro to pharmaco, drug & receptor interation 1&2, autonomic pharmacology 1,2 & 3.So im happy.Yes very happy indeed!!

Sorry i have to begin my blog of the day with such a thing,i come to realise that for the past few weeks,other than imu-related stuff, i seriously do not have any other interesting juicy topics to talk about.Wish my life is somehow more vibrant than what i am having now...sigh...

Another shocking news to announce...i'll be getting my OSPE result this coming wednesday...frankly,i've got nothing to say.Just with all my heart...i hope i'll be able to pass the exam and really, i'll be really happy to get a B. Bless me...pray for me.......

10 days to summative!

Alright, so this aint funny anymore.
Summative is in 10days and what have i done?
immuno(cant remember), parasito(not too good), microbio(cant remember), patho(almost but dont think i remember), pharmaco(never started), comm med(blekkkk)...

Is this good or bad?its pretty bad huh?i know...
But how?summative is in 10days time its so freaking near i feel like crying and peeing in my pant right here,right now!!!

I guess,maybe its just my brain aint functioning well enough,suddenly i just feel like i wasted the whole week of holiday basically doing nothing.How funny to recall that i planned so well before the holiday so that i wouldnt waste any single second of the hol and yet i did just that and now,zoooooooom,hol's gone!

what else can i say? ritonavir indinavir nelfinavir saquinavir...protease inhibitor...just a proof i did study today...need more? perhaps nystatin?its a topical antifungal used against candidiasis, crytococcosis,blastomycosis etc. And while i still remember, let me just fill you in with the 6 steps in atherosclerosis lol : fatty dots > fatty streaks>intermediate lesion>atheromas>fibroatheromas>complicated lesion. cool but well,maybe thats the only thing i remember for today :( :( :(

Tired-ness

sometimes...i just need to know some ways to combat fatigue and lethargic-ness...
i know the best way is to sleep.but, sleep???how the hell can i sleep while ppl are all widely awake drowning themselves in microbio or patho or immuno or parasito or pharmaco,or basically just whatever.

Sometimes...i wish i can just be like that particular someone...

Sleep...Essential??

Oh god its 12.41am and im still awake.
what on earth is going on with me??
i so need to sleep now...my eyebag and dark circle is getting worse day after day after day...
please save me!

Idle-mode

Oh lala...
Congrats me,its 11.03am,supposingly i should be studying for like 3 hours already but no,not at all,i havent even start studying...so freaking scary and this is really getting worse now.
so i shall go take a quick shower and drown myself in tonnes of notes...give me the strength to do it!!

Mantra of the day : I can do it i can do it i can do it!!!

The life of dentist-wannabe

For all dentist-wannabe...
This is how your life's gonna be...waking up at 8am in the morning studying until lunch time,have a quick lunch and continue studying till the evening,have a quick dinner,study till 12am at night and go to sleep.

It sounds scary,but for all the hours and hours of studies,how much can u remember?seriously how much can I, EMMY CHAN, remember?For this, i am not sure... its a pretty scary thought to know that the effort you put into your studies hoping to have some benefits out of it, at the end of the day the tendency for me to forget what i've studied is whole lot higher than the fact that i can remember every detail of the notes.

Im getting depressed.stressed.panic.unloved.bored.tired.HELP ME.

People,if you were to read this,please tell me what should i do?summative is in 2 weeks time.EOS in 4 weeks time.and i have hundreds of lecture notes to cover.Hear me?hundreds of lecture notes.not book.so if were to include books as well, it'll be like...thousands pages??
and out of that thousand pages,how much can i remember?1%?10%?50%?

Frankly everything else seems meaningless.Just let me know one thing.Just let me know this one particular thing and i'll be happy as can be...
Tell me : Emmy, you'll pass summative, you'll pass EOS, u'll sail through all the exams and complete your studies...
Tell me that now people...reassure me...